Laundry Love

I confess I am "domestically challenged" when it comes to certain household duties. Laundry is definitely one of those. I have shrunk and discoloured many items of clothing. I admit it, I'm too impatient to sort and all the rest of it, particularly when living in an apartment where there simply isn't room to hang things neatly, create little piles of colours and darks and lights...no laundry apartheid here!

But the one thing that has bugged me is this: our laundry smells. And it's worse when it's been sitting in the drawer or shelf, bunched up with other smelly items. Now I've always avoided fabric softener because 1) you never use it on cloth diapers and 2) I figured it was basically just a chemical cocktail of nasty things that my babies didn't need against their precious skin.

Well, I was at Mum's the other day helping her have a post-operative shower (she had a knee replacement 3 weeks ago) and I was in awe of her towels. They were soft and fluffy, not crispy like mine, and they smelled NICE. I didn't want to go out and buy a bottle of Downey, but now I knew what towels could be and I wasn't going to settle for stinky and crunchy anymore.

I headed off to the Natural Home Care forum at MDC, but before I could check back for an answer I was at our local HFS buying environmentally friendly dishwasher liquid and laundry powder and what do I see? The same company makes Fabric Softener! I grabbed a bottle of Blue Eucalyptus and Lavender and, for the first time ever, was excited about doing laundry!

I am thrilled with the results. My towels (which admittedly are all about 20 years old) are soft and nothing stinks! In fact, the scent left behind by the fabric softener is so subtle you wouldn't really guess it's a scent. Rather it just smells...clean! I am overjoyed and will never wash without fabric softener again! Thank you Seventh Generation!

Packing made easier

Sorry to sound like an advertisement, but I am just so excited about this...I've been getting a bit stressed out over the pending move. The movers are arriving 10 days from now. DH is going to be away on business in Europe for most of next week, which means it's up to me to pack up our home!

I quickly decided that I didn't have the time or ability to engage in box-hunting - you know, that timeworn tradition of student life where you cruise liquor and grocery stores begging for their used cardboard boxes (and competing with every other penny-pincher about to move that month). But the thought of purchasing a stack of cardboard boxes, using them once, and then disposing of them (even if it is to the recycle bin) seemed like such a waste.

And then I stumbled upon this website. What a fantastic service! And what a user-friendly website. I was able to calculate how many boxes I'd need and place an order with ease. They even allow you to purchase a big-ass marker, packing paper and bubble wrap. And they deliver (and pick up) all of it! I tell ya, this must have been started by some poor mother who had to pack up her household while caring for her young children. I am SO thrilled to have found this, and am looking forward to receiving my stackable boxes. I'm not worried about packing anymore, and I think the movers will thank me, too!

Knowing when it's time to seek help

I've posted before about my son's issues with hurting other children. A couple of days ago at the playground he was up on a play structure and tried to push a small girl down the slide. The more she protested the more he pushed. Finally he grabbed her very long hair and pulled out a chunk of it. It was horrible for me, not to mention the little girl and her mother. I was up early the next morning lying in bed thinking about it. I decided to seek some input and advice from my online mama group.

Many people suggested I have DS evaluated. Reading these words gave me a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I wanted to cling to the notion that it was normal behaviour, that he was just a bit slow, he'll grow out of it, etc. But I recall going down this road with the speech delay. At 19 months it didn't seem so urgent and I kept thinking he'd catch up soon, but by the time he was 2 I had to admit he was behind. So far I've been blaming his age and huge size. But he will be 3 in just a few weeks now and it's becoming apparent to me that he is getting way behind, yet in a way I can't quite put my finger on.

Today I asked a good friend, who has known DS since birth and has a son just 2 days older than DS, whether she got the impression that DS was "different". She was everything you'd want a friend to be: diplomatic, honest, kind, and sensitive. She did say that he seems to have trouble communicating. I, too, have suspected this to be the problem. She talked about the different kinds of therapy available, and how it can be as simple as play therapy to help both me and DS learn better ways to communicate with each other. I'm a very verbal person, and I confess it never occured to me that there were other ways to communicate. When my friend put it this way, it didn't seem so scary.

I know there are certain things about DS that seem "delayed" to me. For example, my DD was able to understand, from the age of 2 onwards, that some things need to wait. Like if she wanted a drink I could say "okay, I'm just going to put these dishes away and then I'll get you a drink". And she'd be happy and wait. DS doesn't get that at all. He'll act as though you said "no" and keep harping on it until you complete the request. He has zero impulse control and the concept of consequences, whether real or imposed, goes right over his head.

Anyways, I told my friend that in my gut I didn't feel that anything was wrong. But when I'm honest with myself I know that is not really true. Deep in my heart I have always worried about him, more so than I did with DD. I can't put my finger on it, just worried that something would turn out "wrong" with him (maybe because I failed my triple screen and ended up having amnio; perhaps that scare has stuck with me).

I've called our family doctor and made an appointment to get a referral for evaluation. I've learned from speech therapy that it can be kind of fun the way they do these things. And really, I think anything that can help me understand DS better will ultimately be a Good Thing. Still, this is all weighing heavily on my heart...

FATE HAS SMILED UPON US!!!!!!

Well, all that stress and disappointment was worth it in the end, as I suspected. We found a house today, and we take possession on September 1st! (but we'll have our place until at least the 15th, so it won't be a rushed move)

It's in a suburb, but the closest one to the city. Our neighbourhood is a very lovely one and it's handy to everywhere we go. It is less than 15 minutes to DH's office, and about 10 minutes to my Mum's place. It is 2 minutes away from the highway that runs out of town and so is handy to all sorts of other places we go (like IKEA, which I will be frequenting in the near future!)

It was one of those viewings where as soon as I walked in I loved it. The layout is supurb. The living room/dining room is bright and cheerful, with a big fireplace (gas, and it works!) with painted white brick surround. Real hardwood floors and sliding doors that lead onto the most massive deck I've ever seen! It is about 500 square feet and faces south, but then wraps around to the west of the house where another door leads into the kitchen. The kitchen is also bright and has a "breakfast nook". There are 3 bedrooms, one of which will be the kids' room, and the other will be our home office. The master bedroom has a large walk-in closet (DH and I will finally be able to share a closet!) and a lovely ensuite with large shower. Another bonus - there is also a set of stairs that go down to a rec room. All the kids toys will go there and they can mess it up as much as they want! Heck, I don't plan on ever picking up toys again, lol! And it has an attached garage with shelves along three sides, room for our big car and even for a workbench for DH.

Outside it gets even better. The yard is fully fenced and surrounded by tall hedges. And it's HUGE. It stretches around three sides of the house. It's a corner lot and it even has a wooden playset AND a separate swing set! I mean really, could it be more perfect? Yes it can! There is a *gardener* to look after the yard! Still, I plan on setting up some square foot gardening plots and planting veggies in the spring. I will also FINALLY be able to compost! I will also put planters on the deck and put bulbs in them for next year.

We will have to buy some furniture. Our little sofa/loveseat combo (teeny condo size) will be split up. The sofa can go in the rec room (it's a bit stained now) and the loveseat will go in the office. I'll basically need to furnish the living room with sofa and chair and rug, and maybe a TV unit. I'll also want some patio furniture! I'll have to check out the end-of-season sales. We can get a big umbrella style set and a smaller set for the off-the-kitchen part. Come next summer the kids can have a big wading pool...

This is a house that begs for kids to come over and PLAY. I can't wait to set up playdates for all my friends, and I can *finally* host some LLL meetings!

I am so incredibly high and happy I'm just bouncing around the place. Goodbye tiny apartment! Goodbye dark, north facing apartment! Goodbye panic at my child throwing toys out the window!

Oh, and did I mention there's a corner store two blocks away for those last minute milk runs? And a park half a block away with a playground? And an elementary school one block away with two large playgrounds? And a huge public pool/ice rink complex within walking distance?

Could I be any happier? I DON'T THINK SO!

And the search continues...

We went to see a house for rent today. It was a lovely old character home, almost 100 years old, that had been beautifully restored by the owners. The yard was fabulous. But alas, the inside was very small (the basement had a suite that is rented out). There was really nowhere for the kids to run or play indoors, and while I appreciate that yard, there will still be days when the kids don't want to go outside, and then they'd be totally underfoot.

I'm sure that the right place will come along. I know it takes time. But it's really frustrating. Rents in the city are so high, and most people have figured out that if they divide their house into suites they'll get more money overall. We'd really like to have a house to ourselves, but perhaps that is asking a bit much.

So I'll just keep on stalking Craigslist and hoping the right place comes along soon...

On the Road Again

This past long weekend we headed up north to a small town called McLeese Lake. We stayed at a campground there owned by a relative. There was fishing and boating and lots of room for the children to run around.

The drive took over 8 hours, including time we stopped to have dinner and let the kids run around at a playground. They handled the trip beautifully, both there and back. And no DVD player!

The scenery was spectacular. We truly do live in a beautiful province. And a huge one! Our long journey took us only a third of the way up the province. We passed various types of geography and topography. The dense, evergreen forests of the West Coasts with its cedar and Douglas Fir gave way to sparser forests dominated by pine. The devastation of the Northern Pine Beetle was evidenced by the bright orange-red of dead conifers that had succumbed to the plague of bark-dwelling insects. Their number has increased dramatically over the last few years due to mild winters and effective suppression of forest fires. Fortunately, some enterprising souls have managed to find a commercial use for wood harvested from infected pine tress, but it has still made an impact on the local forest industry.

The scene above was taken just outside of Lillooet, where the road winds through deep canyons on either side of which rise tall, rocky mountains. We stopped at a lovely picnic area provided and maintained by BC Hydro, the crown corporation that controls the hydroelectricity that powers our province.

Two things were made readily apparent to me on our trip. First, the children thrived in an environment where they could roam freely outside during the day. On our entire trip there was not one temper tantrum or meltdown, nor any major conflicts between the siblings or between children and adults. I have never enjoyed the children more, all while getting ample time for myself to knit and sit in the cool shade. The second revelation was just how vast and beautiful our province is, and how many opportunities exist for wonderful family vacations just a few hours away by car in many directions. I'm looking forward to planning future vacations with the family, whether we are tent camping or RV-ing (I'd like to rent one soon and see how that mode of travel appeals).

Back in the city it has been hard to be in our small, dark apartment after the vast outdoor spaces we'd gotten used to. The search for a rental house is in full swing, though we've decided to stay within the city for now. I'm hoping we can find something before summer ends (usually in early October), though I'm now convinced that rain will not deter the kids from playing outdoors. We have two more trips planned this month: the Bonfire music festival, and spending the Labour Day long weekend back at Monck Park in the lovely and desolate Nicola Valley.